Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Marriage Matters: The basics of my relationship counseling



Welcome to my first installment of my marriage  blog series - Marriage Matters! I have seen more couples, divorcing, pre-marriage, married and just dating - than any other population in my private practice. I truly enjoy helping others gain insight into their relationship concerns and providing new skills for others to use.




This is where I'll leave my disclosure - although I provide relationship counseling services, my services as with any other- can never guarantee a particular outcome. I've had couples come to me to resolve issues, that were never resolved because one or both refused to make changes. My purpose of relationship counseling is to help two partners gain communication and problem solving skills. I value this delivery of services because I'm less concerned about whatever 'problems' are lingering in the relationship and more concerned about helping two people 'work together' to resolve not only the problems that brought them into my office in the first place, but any other that may appear down the line.

I always encourage couples to seek counseling before getting married - premarital services. This is helpful when covering a large amount of major (and minor) decisions that  need to be discussed and hashed out before saying 'I do'. You can only imagine how many couples that divorce because of misunderstandings that went without clarification for years (she doesn't want children, he expects her stay at home with kids, she believed he would support her religion, etc.) These type of services can beneficial for couples who are not yet engaged but in a serious mutual relationship.

Once married - the basics of counseling serve to help develop and increase skills needed to maintain that open communication and increased intimacy fit to weather any type of storm. I prefer to see couples separate in the beginning of sessions in order to provide a more personalized experience for each partner. Marriage counseling can be a solution focused therapy, brief and is strongly encouraged for partners to return for 'tune-ups' every so often or as needed.

Divorce counseling is helpful when working with partners who want to develop cordial understanding and continue working together to manage any residual concerns. I consider any type of counseling while married or separated to be considered marriage counseling. Divorce counseling can also be helpful for one (or both) partner who desires to seek ongoing counseling to process changes and transitions that occur during a divorce.

These are some examples of my views on relationship counseling and what to expect if seeking services for your relationship, no matter what stage you might be in. My services are confidential, secure, and provided by a licensed and trained therapist - what any couple could desire to move forward in learning skills to better their relationship.

Please feel free to make contact (803) 295-0609, through my website www.nwccounseling.org, or even via email ncalderon@nwccounseling.org - all of which are private and secure lines.

As always - I look forward to serving you!